Do you know what I was going to do to you? It would have been terrible. Just awful. I was going to write a review of a breakfast restaurant I went to while I was in Florida. While it may have been a fine breakfast restaurant, my review wasn’t going to set the world on fire. It was just a breakfast restaurant that was part of a chain we don’t have here in the northeast.

Do you know what we do have in the northeast? New effing York City.  One of the greatest cities in the world. Yes, if you’re from the city, you have to say New effing York City. Every. Damn. Time. Sure, breakfast in Orlando  may be nice, but it is no New effing York City. And if you’re going to New effing York City, don’t you want to stay at the best hotel in New effing York City?

Do you remember the 2013 movie The Great Gatsby with Leo DiCap? (Yeah, Leo DiCap, that’s what I call him when we’re hanging out) If this movie wasn’t filmed in The Best Hotel in All of New York, it should have been because that’s all that I could think of when I stayed at The New Yorker Hotel. That and high strung coiffed dogs, but more on that later.

When I was in The New Yorker Hotel, all I could think of was The Great Gatsby, not because I’m a billionaire who is out to corrupt a naïve farm boy new to the city, but because if that big party Gatsby threw wasn’t at The New Yorker Hotel, it should have been.  Located in the Hell’s Kitchen neighborhood of New effing York City, the New Yorker Hotel was built in the late 1920’s, the era The Great Gatsby story was set in, and it shows. The art deco interior of the hotel is spectacularly spot on. When I stayed there I felt as if I were in the movie with Leo DiCap. Maybe because I was constantly toasting things. Eventually the bartender cut me off.

The outside of the hotel won’t impress you. The cheesy New Yorker light up sign affixed to the hotel looks like something added on in the 1950’s. But when you step into the lobby…

And while you’re there, if you don’t want to roam the streets of Manhattan, and you want stay in for a breakfast better than Orlando, the legendary Tick Tock Diner is attached to the hotel. For dinner you can enjoy fine Italian-American dining at Trattoria Bianca. If you’d like to whet your whistle in the evening, open until 2 a.m. is the Butcher & Banker, a steak restaurant and high end cocktail joint created from an old bank, including the ancient vault. This is where you can have your Leo DiCap toast.

What? You want to hear about the high-strung coiffed dogs? When I stayed there The Westminster Kennel Club Annual Dog Show was happening right down the street at Madison Square Garden, and many of the dogs and their owners were staying in The New Yorker, which had provided treadmills in one of the lower floors for the dogs to exercise on. There was also another trip when I was going to stay at The New Yorker and the Pope ruined that for me, but that’s a story for another time.

One of the best things about The New Yorker Hotel is also it’s  price-point. If you wanted to check-in there tonight, you could get a room for $175. For me, the spectacular art deco decor, location, amenities and reasonable cost, make The New Yorker  my favorite New effing York City hotel.

Have a great weekend and safe effing travels! ~Phil